The Miller Family

What a difference 8 months is!

2011-12-23T12:13:00.000-07:00

Hudson, aka Stinker(for now), is 8 months old. I can't believe how fast this first year is going. Especially considering the fact that I've been awake for about 6 months. This month is by far the most different. Hudson is growing so much and doing new things all the time. Here are some of his new things....

-Hudson started crawling 2 weeks ago. He is on the move and into everything.

-Hudson can also pull up on things. He's not real good at this one but he'll get there.

-he can sign "milk".

-he is still not a good sleeper but we are working on it. we've decided to take a more natural route so he is taking all sort of "flowers and dirt".

- he has added the sound mamamamamma. I love this one.

- he will say mmmmm after taking a yummy bite.

- he is starting to really want me all the time or at least be able to see me.

- Hud is starting to get a sense of humor and will laugh at silly things.

- I love watching and playing with this kid. It is really cool to see him figure stuff out. He is super smart...like his dad.

- he LOVES his dad. He will perk up when Nathan comes home and get really excited. They read together and wrestle. I'm thinking he will end up a daddy's boy.

I can't begin to explain my love for this kid. He is so happy and so full of joy. I'm so thankful for him and his sweet spirit.

Hudson is 7 months!

2011-12-05T06:05:00.000-07:00

Our little man is growing so fast!

Hudson is getting so big and doing so many new things. He's had a cold and I've taken him to the Dr. twice so that they can tell me that. It's hard when you they can't tell you what's wrong. Anyways, because of that I know that he is 19lbs 2oz.

Hudson is so close to crawling. He was going backwards for a while but now he is turning in circles or rolling everywhere to get where he wants. Yesterday was the first day he was into everything. Nathan and I are going to have to baby proof our space real soon.

We went to see my sister at Thanksgiving and Hudson loved her kids. You could tell he wanted to be running around with them so bad. He didn't really sleep very much because he was so into watching his cousins.

We love our little man. He is so sweet and kind and funny and smart and most important he really is filled with God's spirit.

Hudson is half way there!(to one that is)

2011-11-03T07:07:00.001-06:00

Hudson Wayne:
17.7lbs
27.5in

Our little man Hudson is 6 months old. He is more awesome than ever!

It seems like everyday he does new tricks. Here are as many as I can remember....

-he eats 3 meals a day now and loves it. So far he has eaten butternut squash and sweet potatoes and apples. He is doing really well.

- he has his two bottom teeth and i think more on the way

-he can now get up on his hands and knees

-he is a log rollin' machine. he can roll across the floor now

-when he wants something or is excited to see something he will wave his hands like crazy

-we started letting him sit up in the bath tub and he loves it. he will cry when we take him out now.

-he has learned to "get mad" and it's pretty funny. He will growl at usually only me and it usually means he is tired.

-he loves to be sung to. His favorites are The Itsy Bitsy Spider and Oh what a rain it would be and You are my Sunshine(rock version)

-he is still really full of joy pretty much always

a word on his sleeping....

This week I tried to sleep train him again. It was horrible and then he ended up getting a cold so now he can't breathe. I've felt so much anxiety over this for about 4 months now. So I decided to not be anxious about it and just let it be. We are putting him in his crib at first but if he wakes up and won't go back in he just sleeps with us. This has been great! Since then he usually sleeps for about 3-5 hours on his own. And I'm much less anxious and starting to believe that one day he will sleep all night on his own. Praise God!

We love Hudson so much. In fact we often ask each other if other parents love their kids as much as we do. He is so great and such a huge blessing from God!

Hudson Wayne is 5 Months(and 2 weeks) Old!

2011-10-03T18:47:00.000-06:00

Once again, I am late. But at least our Hudson is still 5 months old.

He is so cute and getting cuter all the time.

Here are some of things about Hudson:

Hudson is talking a lot lately. He has even talked to my sister and my mom on the phone. I think he knows what to do with a phone.

He is getting into everything and he can't even move yet.

Hudson can almost sit up by himself.

He is eating cereal and really loves it. In fact, if you don't feed him fast he will growl at you.

Hudson is getting better at naps but still doesn't sleep well at night. He loves to sleep with us and we don't really care right now. It's not comfortable but at least I feel like I'm getting some rest.

Hudson seems like he is playing with more meaning lately. I'm not sure if that makes sense but he has a purpose when playing with a toy now.

We love Hudson so much and are blessed every day by this little boy.

Hudson Wayne is 4 months old!

2011-08-23T19:03:00.000-06:00

Our little Huddy Buddy is 4 months old now! In the last few weeks he has learned so many new things. It's amazing how he grows so quickly.

Here are some of the new things he is doing...

He can now roll-over from back to front and is really close to getting front to back.

When he rolls over he is really good an reaching for toys or getting them out of the way.

Hudson can now pull up to sitting position while holding my fingers.

He can also put his toes in his mouth and suck on them. It's super cute and also very messy.

He smiles a lot and will listen to conversations really well.

Recently we went to Oklahoma so that my side of the family could meet Hudson. While we were there he got an ear infection. It was really sad but I'm glad that it is on the mends now.

Hudson is not a great sleeper. Since he rolls over now he is not sure how to sleep. It's been a long couple of weeks. But we are in sleep camp right now so hopefully this phase will pass.

His doctors appointment is next week so I'm not sure how much he weighs yet or how long he is.

Hudson is such a blessing and full of joy. We love him more and more everyday!

A little bragging...

2011-08-06T19:29:00.000-06:00

Hudson has been really watching us eat lately. He will follow every bite from the plate to your mouth. Tonight he was watching me eat and as I put the food in my mouth he would put his hand in his mouth. He is so smart.

Later tonight while Nathan was putting him to bed he started "singing". I was in the room and wondering what if something was wrong when I remembered that I forgot to sing him his going to bed song that I sing every night. So Nathan sang it to him and he stopped singing and went to sleep.

Hudson is so smart and fun. I love this kid more everyday.

3 months old

2011-08-03T09:54:00.000-06:00

i am late on this post and hudson is actually 3 1/2 months old now. Hudson is awesome. We love everyday with him and feel even more blessed.

Hudson recently had to go to Mercy Children's Hospital to get a hernia checked out. He does not have to have surgery just yet but will if we see it again.

They weighed Hudson and he is 14lbs 2oz. He is still so long.

He can do lots of fun tricks now.

He sits up really well and can sit in his Bumbo Seat and his Exersaucer really well.
He will stick out his tounge if you stick yours out at him.
He can almost roll over.
He is very smiley and will laugh at us now too.
He is starting to like his car seat a little bit more which is so a relief

Hudson is truly full of joy. You can't help but be happy when your around him. We love him more and more every day and will most likely burst soon.

2 Months

2011-06-25T15:13:00.000-06:00

Hudson is 2 months old! I love how much he is growing. I always hear people say how sad they are that their child is getting old but I'm loving it. It's so much fun to see how much they learn and how each day is new.

Here are some of Hudson's stats...

11 lbs 8 oz
24 inches long

Hudson is smiling a lot lately. He smiles at us and will laugh at us too.

He loves his play mat and will lay down and hit and grab at the toys.

He loves looking in the mirror at the baby who makes funny faces back at him.

He can roll over to his side and I think he will most likely sleep on his tummy some day.

Hudson sleeps great. He wakes up usually around once a night and goes to bed anywhere from 7-8pm.

He is our Happy Hudson and we are blessed!

Hudson Wayne is One Month!

2011-06-07T15:02:00.000-06:00

Actually Hudson is 6 weeks but I've been behind.

Hudson came into our life really about 10 months ago. But he made his appearance on April 22nd. He was 8lbs and 1oz and 20ins long. Nathan and I have been in love with him from the first day. Hudson is amazing and totally a gift from God. He is a great baby and we are filled with joy now that he is in our life.

At Hudson's one month appointment he was 9lbs 6oz and 22in. He is our growing boy!

He has started to smile more and is focusing more on our faces. I'm pretty sure he can identify both of our voices. He likes tummy time and I think he will sleep on his tummy when he is a little older. He sleeps really well for a newborn. He is waking up about 2 times in the middle of the night. Naps during the day are still a mystery...somedays he takes them and somedays he waits till 4 to nap.

We love Hudson and can't thank God enough for him!

We cannot begin to imagine...

2011-03-20T13:00:00.001-06:00

Yesterday Nathan's mom got us our baby book. One of the pages in it has things you list things that are going on in the world when your baby is born. I was looking at it last night and I mentioned to Nathan that there are so many news stories going on and maybe even more when this little guys arrives. There are so many life changing events happening in our world right now. I'm kinda glad that the only top story won't be the Royal Wedding.

I was looking through the newspaper today and was amazed at how much is going on right now. Japan, Libya, Yemen, The Royal Wedding, Haiti, Egypt, March Madness, and if your local here in KC the train show are all headlines.

The first few paragraphs of the article about Egypt caught my attention. Today, many Egyptians are voting for the first time ever. Many of the young people are taking pictures of their ink stained fingers and sending them to each other via mobile phone. The paper had one story of a 48 year old father whose son went to his house and lifted him over his shoulder because he couldn't walk and that man got to cast his vote for the first time today. Amazing.

Every time I see or read one of these stories I always say, "We cannot imagine anything like this." I don't think I've ever been that excited about voting. I admit that if it weren't for those "I Voted" stickers I would have a hard time getting myself to go. That's so sad to say.

Somehow through all the sadness and things that I cannot begin to understand, I'm reminded that God is there. Praise God that people in Egypt are getting to vote today. I think these are the stories I will write in our son's baby book. I want him to know that God is working in the midst of all the conflict in our world today. I hope I can raise him to be thankful for things that I take for granted.

Ways I know I'm almost done...

2011-03-19T19:37:00.000-06:00

I feel like I've been pregnant forever. But the end is in sight. I know this for a few reasons.

First, I will not drive long distances anymore. This is huge because I really don't like where I live and would love to go to the city or Columbia anytime instead of being here. But I'm done until this baby gets here.

Second, I've been joking lately and telling the baby at night that he can't come today because I am too tired. But today after not sleeping well and being in the car all day and feeling like I have mono right now....yes that is how tired I am...I have told him that if he wants to come it's ok. Really he should wait one more week but it will work out.

Third, in the last week I have cried just about every day over really dumb things.

Fourth, we have a towel rack for a dish towel that is to be used for drying your hands. My blood starts to boil every time I go in and find it on the counter instead of it's home. I haven't told my husband how mad this makes me because I know it's just hormones and very silly. So I'm trying to ignore it for now.

I have had an amazing pregnancy. I haven't had too many complaints and for the most part I have enjoyed it. However, I am more than anything ready to meet this little man. I can't wait to see him and fall more in love with him than I already have.

If you look above at my count down....

2011-03-04T11:54:00.001-07:00

You will see that my watermelon is almost home! That's all.

Valentines Gifts

2011-02-28T17:55:00.000-07:00

This was Nathan's Valentine. So glad Mother Nature worked with me.

And the following is my version of an "edible" bouquet for Nathan's Mom for Valentines. I also made the card. This was before it turned over in the car.

A good book

2011-02-14T08:23:00.000-07:00

When I was in Africa, my cousin Adam asked me if I knew a professor who taught creative writing named David James Duncan. I had heard of him but not had his class yet. Adam was reading a bunch of his books at the time and one he told me about was River Teeth. This book is great. It's a bunch of short stories that are written so well you feel like you are a part of what's going on.
If you are looking for a good book to read I recommend this one. It's nice to pick it up and read some of my favorite stories every once in a while. My favorites are Her Idiots and Mickey Mantel's Khoen.
Just thought I'd share.

Silwee Berries

2011-01-20T11:55:00.000-07:00

I'm one of those people who notices things that most don't. If you are going to a National Park you would want to take me because I will be the one who points out animals that most people won't see.

Yesterday I saw some things in my strawberries. I can hear my niece, Morgandy saying, "Aunt Lana, that's silwee."

This berry is very patriotic. It's the USA...well minus Florida.

This one is a chicken.

This one is just a smile.

I tried really hard to see Mother Mary in one of these berries. But she is not here. I would keep looking but I have eaten them all in excitement of seeing what is inside.

Snow.

2011-01-19T19:56:00.003-07:00

I love the snow. I know it can be hard to drive in and can cause school to last a long time but there are so many good things about it. Here are some of my reasons why I love the snow.

Snow makes everything peaceful.

Candles smell better and feel warmer when there is

snow outside.

Brownies taste better(notice the cute snoopy plate)

Hot beverages taste better and warm you up.

I made this chai from scratch and it is so good!

Snow makes everything look pretty. Even the most

common decorations.

Snow give you great memories. This is Montana snow.

I loved coming here to cross-country ski. It feels like your in a post card or Narnia.

Snow is fun to play in.

I feel like God gives us snow when we need a break. So enjoy your day off(if you have one) and take time to rest, read, write a letter to a friend, or talk to God. I'm thankful for the snow and the day with Nathan tomorrow.

So cute...

2011-01-19T12:50:00.000-07:00

Look at what I found! These are too cute and kinda expensive but really worth it.

Who will be Jesus to him...

2011-01-15T06:20:00.000-07:00

When I was younger I hear a song on the radio with the words, "Who will be Jesus to them. Who'll show the love that restores them again. They do not need a judge, they need a friend. Who will be Jesus to them." I heard it once and never heard it again. This was before internet was popular or at least in my life so I couldn't go look up the name of it. Instead it has been forever engraved in my mind.

There are certain times when this song comes back into my mind. I'm sure it's when God is trying to tell me something. Last Sunday this song was playing loud and clear. I had been flying home on Saturday and it wasn't until late that night that I heard about the Tragedy in Tucson. Nathan mentioned it to me right before I went to bed. It wasn't until the next morning when I realized what a true tragedy it really was. I felt so bad for the victims and their families. I have been through a tramatic time before and I couldn't help but think that this was only the beginning of this time for them. The nightmares and constant thought of that day will follow them for along time. I hope that they will seek help and I pray that they have comfort that surrounds them.

But there was one person in all of this that I'm sure God has put on my heart, the young man who did all this. When I see his photo on the news I can't help but think, "who was Jesus to him." I'm sure most people would think I'm crazy and that he doesn't deserve a thought. However, he was made by the same God who made everyone else in this world. He was made to be a child of God and to have a purpose in life. Unfortunately, he was lost. As most of us do, he got on the wrong track but he stayed there. He was obviously very sick and needed help.

Nathan and I are in the process of becoming church planters. But first we are Christians and children of God. We were both made for a purpose, like Jared Loughner. Our jobs are not with the school district, but with Jesus. We are here to "be Jesus" to anyone and everyone. In the media there are so many "what if" questions about what happened in Tucson. What if someone had crossed that young mans path and showed him Jesus days before the shooting? Would he have changed his mind and maybe even given his life back to Jesus? It most likely doesn't help to ask "what ifs" in these times. But it makes me think of something that Paul said in Colissians 4:5..make the most of every opportunity. Every time we see someone we need to be sharing Jesus with them in some way.

It's not too late for this young man to find Jesus. As we pray for the victims and their families we can pray for him and for his family. We can pray that God will put someone in his life now and help him see Jesus. We can pray that this won't happen again and that others who are also lost will be found. After all, "he does not need a judge he needs a friend. So who will be Jesus to him."

Trying to be great for God

2011-01-06T18:51:00.000-07:00

I'm so thankful that I got to spend the holidays in Florida with my family. It has been very refreshing to spend time with them and get to see everyone. I love coming here and always get sad when I have to return.
I've had some major anxiety about returning to Missouri this time. I am looking forward to seeing Nathan after being away from him for a week. But that's about it. Every day there is a challenge in just about every area of life. I've spend the last week praying about going back and asking God to help me live a life for Him. Today I had a feeling that I was made to do great things for God and His kingdom. But in Missouri I'm not great. I'm depressed and sad and just trying to make it to the next day. I do try. I try very hard to fit into a Missouri life. This is where I go wrong. I need to try more to fit into God's kingdom instead of this place that is definitely not my home.
I still have some anxiety about going back to Missouri but I feel like I've also had enough rest and encouragement here that I can work hard to live a great life.

Morgandy Moran...Super kid!

2011-01-01T11:04:00.000-07:00

I'm very impressed by this 4 year old, Morgandy. She makes me very excited and full of hope that I can raise an awesome kid.
Morgandy is the least picky eater I have ever met. Her mom tells me that it's because she doesn't get a choice. I hope to teach my kids to eat or at least try everything. I want my children to be as healthy as they can be and learn that very early on.
She also loves to help around the house. Helping out is fun for her. She loves to help cook and clean and she even was excited to put up the Christmas tree today(my least favorite thing to do). She took off ornaments and helped us put them in a box. It was so much fun to see her excited and not think that being helpful is awful. She even gets excited and asks to help you in whatever you are doing.
I look forward to having my own little helper...in a couple of years of course. Don't worry I won't make my newborn do the dishes. But I will make sure he knows that being a helper is fun.

To the girls of SCHS...

2010-12-22T12:19:00.000-07:00

Dear girls of SCHS,

I have heard that you have been fighting with each other a lot lately. My first reaction is that is not very smart to do just days before Santa comes. Then I get really sad. I'm sad that you feel like something so terrible has happened that you have to rip out each other's earrings and hair. I'm sorry to say but life will get harder and the things that upset you now will seem very small. I wish I could embrace you in all your anger and let you know that there is a better answer to your troubles. I wish I could let you know that boys are silly and not worth the pain, since that is mostly what you are scratching each other over. I'm sorry that you don't have adults in your life to show you how to work out issues in love. I wish there was a place that you could go and see that happening. I want you to know that God is bigger than problem you ever come across. I will pray for you all as the next semester approaches. I will pray that God will bring you peace and love this Christmas. I will pray that you are filled with thanksgiving for the friends you have and that when Satan tries to get between you, you will feel a peace inside and solve your issues in love. I will pray that drama in your life seems small to the blessings you receive. I will pray that adults in your life show you and each other love.

Love,
Lana

a letter to the girls at the high school where my husband teaches. just something on my heart after hearing they have had at least 2 girl fights a day for a week.

Recent baby news.

2010-12-18T07:50:00.000-07:00

I went to my 24 week appt. yesterday and things are going really well.

I got to meet the third of the midwives. You meet all of them in case one is unavailable. I really love all of them. We have also met the doctor, but hopefully that will be the only time I have to see him. I won't have a doctor unless something goes wrong.

I have now gained 21 lbs. Most women gain about 10 at this point. However, I have only gained it in my tummy so we aren't too worried. In fact, I am really proud.

Also I got to hear the results of our last ultrasound. He is in the 68% of weight. So he's a little on the big side right now. They did not see any sign of a cleft lip or pallet. And he has all his parts.

Everything is going really well. We could not be more thankful!

Day 30

2010-11-30T18:23:00.000-07:00

I have so many things to be thankful for it's hard to choose on this last day. So I'm thankful for life and for God who gave me life and Jesus who helps me out when I stink it up.

Day 29

2010-11-29T15:40:00.000-07:00

I am thankful for my kinda job. I call it a kinda job because I'm a sub. So I don't know when I will work and if I don't want to work I can say no thanks. I like that everyday I can leave the hard times in the room and not have to bring it home with me. I like that my weeks look very different. I can be in a classroom from every school and nothing is ever the same. I like that I can be in the same school with Nathan sometimes. I like that I'm known in most of the schools now. I like that I know most of the students. I like that I'm pretty good at my job, although I would never want to teach and I would be an awful teacher. I like that when I have a doctor's appt or when the baby comes I can just say that I'm finished, no awkward talks or paperwork. I like that somedays I can just be there half a day. I like that I can just leave at the end of the day. So even on days like today, when I had a kid throw up and a kid who wasn't paying attention and ran into another student and ended up with a bloody nose, busted lip, and a chipped tooth and a kid who would not listen to me even when I reminded her that I was the adult, I am still thankful for my kinda job.

Day 27 and 28

2010-11-28T17:01:00.000-07:00

When we were at the Theology Lab in October we were asked to make a list of "Rules of Life." I made mine and Nathan made his and when we got home we put them on our bathroom mirror. I must confess that usually I am terrible at this kind of thing. I'll do really well for a week and then forget about it. But this time I have stuck with them. I've made a commitment to do these rules until the baby gets here and then I will make new ones. Life is always changing so your rules probably should too.
I've realized this past week that these rules are helping me be better. I'm thankful for this. I'm grateful that God knows what I need in certain seasons of my life. I'm thankful that God is showing me how to be a better part of His Kingdom.
One of my rules was to speak only in love. This one is really hard. And I'm not always perfect. But I've gotten better and that I am thankful for. This rule may stay on my next list too.

Day 26

2010-11-26T18:56:00.000-07:00

Today I'm thankful for getting to spend some time with Nathan. It wasn't very much but I'll take it. This Thanksgiving seems to be really busy and not restful, which is good. But I really enjoyed coming home today and just hanging out with Nathan. Tomorrow it's back to busy so I'm going to finish enjoying the time we have now.

I'm thankful for Boys!

2010-11-25T07:50:00.000-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today I'm filled to the brim with thankfulness for our little boy. We went for our ultrasound yesterday to make sure everything was ok and find out if it's a boy or girl. It's a boy for sure.
I was totally convinced it was a girl. All the old wives tales pointed to girl. The Chinese Lunar Calendar said girl. Even the heart rate said girl. I had dreams that it was a girl and just felt like it was. Obviously we didn't care what the sex would be but I am still in unbelief that we are having a boy.
I thank God so much for this blessing.

Day 24

2010-11-24T14:23:00.001-07:00

Today I'm thankful for a relaxing day with my husband and niece. It's been fun to bake and just lay around.

Day 23

2010-11-23T11:12:00.000-07:00

I'm thankful for all the little kicks I've been feeling. I still can't believe that we are going to be having a baby soon. This is an amazing blessing and I'm enjoying feeling this little baby grow.

PS tomorrow we get to find out blue or pink!

22

2010-11-22T15:44:00.001-07:00

Today I am thankful for the nice cold front that is coming through. I love it when it decides to be fall here.

Day 20 and 21

2010-11-21T16:35:00.000-07:00

I am thankful for good health, easy access to food and water, a healthy baby, and a very loving husband who reminds me of these things when I'm having a sad day.

Day 19

2010-11-20T08:05:00.000-07:00

I am thankful to God for showing me a good and beautiful life.

Last night I went with Nathan's family to see the Rockettes preform. It was a great show but the show afterwards was even better. Nathan's cousin is coming home today from Africa. He is on leave for the Thanksgiving holidays. His mom and girlfriend were with me last night and both were glowing. It was so great to see how excited they were in their own ways. Patty(the mom) was so excited to have her son home, and soon all of her kids. Caitlin(the girlfriend) was beaming with excitement to have her love home soon. I think we could have spent our whole time in an empty stadium and they would have been so happy.

Patty is very outgoing and talks to everyone. I love it because it reminds me of my family. Not many people in my family have ever met a stranger. Patty is the same way and last night was talking to everyone. As we left the show, Caitlin and I noticed that Patty wasn't with us. So we waited knowing that she was most likely talking to someone. When she got down to the exit she turned and started talking to the usher. I stayed and waited for her. I'm not really familiar with the venue and didn't want to get lost myself, so I just stood by the wall half listening to her conversation and half wanting to get going. As she left usher I heard the usher say,"Have a great time with your son and enjoy your holidays." I thought oh my she is telling every person who will listen about Jacob coming home tomorrow. I think that is so awesome. What a love she has for her son.

I thought about Jesus and wondered if this is how he would spread the Gospel if He had been at the Rockettes show. I think Jesus totally would have. He would go around and tell everyone about the love he has to offer and about the amazing things that his followers are doing and how he can't wait to greet them.

I also thought about how we can often get caught up in our life and want to get going instead of stopping and listening to good news.

I'm excited for Jacob and his family today. I am really excited for the people who will be at the airport today from 3:00 to 4:00 because I'm sure Aunt Patty will be sharing her good news with all of them. I'm thankful that God reminded me that if I would stop and listen I can witness a good and beautiful life.

Day 18

2010-11-18T16:54:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for Jaime Fisher and Jes Partian. I'm glad that I can always call them and ask questions or share laughs on the joy of pregnancy. I am so glad that these amazing girls are part of my life.

I am also thankful that Nathan took the entire day off tomorrow. I can't wait to spend a weekday with him!

Days 15, 16, and 17

2010-11-17T15:45:00.000-07:00

I'm thankful for Morgandy Skye Moran. I'm so glad that even though I can count the times I've seen her on two hands, she still knows who I am. I hope Bretton knows me too someday.

Day 13 and 14

2010-11-14T19:40:00.000-07:00

I am thankful that I got to come "home" to my parents house. I love getting to be here and hanging out with them. It's funny how when you feel so bad it just takes coming home for even a day or so to feel better. I think I can make it to Christmas now. I'm also thankful that my husband supports me when I need a break.

On the 12th day of Thankfulness...

2010-11-12T16:13:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for the rain and the cool weather. I have complained(probably too much) lately about the hot days we've been having here. I really love the cold and am one of the few here who likes it. Yesterday it got cold and rainy. I am very thankful for the change we have had.

Day 11

2010-11-11T14:56:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for the all the luxuries I have. I am thankful that I am able to have food, water, shelter, and a loving family. I think I take a lot for granted and really notice that I do around this time of the year. I pray that I can remember to be more thankful for the things I do have.

Day 10

2010-11-10T15:28:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for really great nieces and nephews. I was more than excited when Morgandy was born because I became and aunt for the first time. And then I got married and got 2 more nieces and 2 more nephews. And now I have one more nephew so....three of each! I love that they are all at different stages of life right now. From just almost walking to starting to drive. They are all very sweet and so much fun. I'm thankful that God blessed me with such great kids in my life and I pray that I can be Jesus to them.

Day 9

2010-11-09T14:33:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for getting to live in Missoula, Montana. I'm not sure if you can be thankful for something in the past but I am. I'm thankful for the awesome family that I have there. I'm thankful for meeting my husband there. I'm thankful for the friendships I have there. I'm really thankful for the amazing adventures that I got to go on.

I'm also thankful for places like these....

Day 8

2010-11-08T15:18:00.000-07:00

Today I am very thankful for my Grando. I've been thinking about her with all sorts of baby gifts that we have been receiving. I can hear her in the back of my head asking if I wrote a thank you note yet. I'm thankful that she taught me to always tell other's how much you appreciate their kindness. She is so good at that.

I'm also thankful for her sense of humor. I love laughing with her.

I'm also thankful for her outgoingness. I like how she has never met a stranger. I'm glad that I have some of Gdo in me and hope I can continuously live life like her.

Day 7

2010-11-07T07:51:00.000-07:00

I totally failed yesterday. I think I ended the day with about 4 meltdowns. It was not a good day for me at all.
So today I'm thankful for new days. I thankful that I have a husband who forgives me and still loves me even when I'm an idiot. And I'm very thankful for a God that allows me to have a do-over.
I did go to the zoo (by myself) and had an ok time. I needed the walk and to be outside. I probably didn't need to be alone but it worked out. Here are a few shots...

Day 6

2010-11-06T07:12:00.000-06:00

The day has just started and honestly I'm having a hard time finding something to be thankful for already. I am consumed with a feeling of loneliness yet again for the 1000000000th day in a row. The bad thing is that it's only going to get worse in the next few months. Nathan is starting basketball season and today spending the day driving to Springfield to be with his nephew for about 2 hours for his birthday. I'm not going because riding in a car is very uncomfortable these days and I don't want to spend my Saturday in the car. I'm glad he is going and I realize that I could go and not be alone instead of complaining right now but I just don't want to.
When it comes to my life here in Missouri I have a very hard time being thankful. Mainly because I feel lonely here a lot. I could write a lot about why I feel so alone but this is suppose to be about Thankfulness.
Last night we went to the Community Cafe. I love going there and talking to the people. The Cafe is a place here where poor/homeless people can go for a hot meal 5 days a week. A lot of them are older and just want to talk to you. Most of the time they don't make sense but it's still good to talk to them and listen to their stories.
One person there is Mrs. Taylor. She is a retired teacher who is now a substitute teacher. But she doesn't sub a lot because she is constantly going on mission trips. She just returned from Mexico and is going to Haiti for the 4th time this year in about a week. She welcomes people to the Cafe and kinda takes attendance. Mrs. Taylor lives just down the street from the Cafe in a pretty bad part of town. I love how she is intentional and incarnational in everything she does. She lives alone but I don't think she is lonely at all. She has filled her life with the Mission of God. I'm thankful for Mrs. Taylor. I'm thankful that she is here to remind me that life isn't always about having lots of friends or feeling apart of a church or a family. Those things are all very sad and I wish life was better but I'm thankful for God showing me people like Mrs. Taylor. I can't go on mission trips right now, but I can ask God to show me things here that need to be done for Him. My prayer today will not be on taking the loneliness away but to open my eyes to see God working in my life. I'm thankful for a Savor who is willing to let me be apart of his Kingdom.

Day 5

2010-11-05T18:54:00.000-06:00

Today I am thankful that we got to spend time at the community cafe. I really feel like this can be a place where I can be incarnational. I enjoy the regulars there and love that they make me feel like family.

Day 4

2010-11-04T18:55:00.000-06:00

Today I'm thankful for friends afar. I would have a hard time if I didn't have all of my far away friends. I wish that I could see everyone more. God has blessed me with great friends from afar.

Day 3

2010-11-03T15:23:00.000-06:00

Today I am thankful for our future child. I can't thank God enough for this amazing gift. I love everyday of this pregnancy and can't wait to meet him/her.

The Mission of God and Politics...

2010-11-03T07:35:00.000-06:00

I often joke with Nathan about the things I will do when I am "Queen of the World." My campaign is filled with silliness, but what I consider very good ideas to help out the world. For example, everyone will be required to dance around 3pm everyday....it's just good for your soul. Everyone will also have to do at least one nice thing for other's before the day is done...imagine a world like that. I know that I'm just being silly but I'm very serious about things we can do to make this world a little bit better.

After the recent elections, I've been thinking a lot about making this world(and our country) better. This morning I've been thinking about things we talked about at our last lab with Mission Alive. We spent time discussing Mission of God, Kingdom of God, and Incarnation.

This morning I woke up noticing that not one person I voted for won. When I told Nathan he asked me how that made me feel. The only feeling I had was the feeling of hunger. I was ready to eat breakfast. I really didn't care much about it. I have this overwhelming thought that God is ultimately the one in control here. So I wondered how can we help our leaders whether or not we like them. I also asked Nathan how many of the candidates based their campaigns on the Mission of God...not many.

But what if that actually happened? Or instead of what ifs...what can we as Christians do now to help the Mission of God shine through these leaders. Instead of complaining all the time about our elected leaders can we pray for them to make the right choices in all aspects of their lives? How awesome would it be if we all prayed for our leaders on a regular basis. And when I say pray, I'm talking about praying for God's Mission to be very apparent in everything they do.

I live in a place where people talk about politics a lot...or maybe it's that I'm older and have to always sit at the "adult table" now and people have always talked about it. Anyways, I hardly ever hear about the Mission of God when politics is the subject. 1 Timothy 2:1-2 says, ^-"The first thing I want you to do is pray. Pray every way you know how, for everyone you know. Pray especially for rulers and their governments to rule well so we can be quietly about our business of living simply, in humble contemplation. This is the way our Savior God wants us to live."from the Message I don't like talking about politics at all, because it causes a lot of doubts in people's faith, arguments, and strife. But I could totally talk about it if we changed our conversations to how we can pray for our leaders.

I'm thankful that I don't have to be Queen of the World. Although I think I'm going to start praying more for the Mission of God to be in our leaders. Prayer is a powerful thing, more powerful than you can even imagine. I'm thankful that we have the Bible to read and see people like Paul who believed in the power of prayer. I'm even more thankful that we have a God who is more powerful than any leader of any elected position. I hope we can start praying to speak in love and of God's mission when we talk about politics. My prayer is that we can have leader's who are filled with the Mission of God and who long for the Kingdom of God and who will be Incarnational in our world.

Day 2

2010-11-02T14:05:00.000-06:00

taken at our ugly christmas sweater party 2009

Today I'm thankful for my husband. I'm very blessed to have such an amazing friend who takes care of me and loves me so much. I can't wait to see him be a dad and continue our journey together.

30 days of Thankfulness

2010-11-01T15:45:00.000-06:00

A sweet person I know did this last year and I just noticed she started again today. I'm gonna be a copy cat and do 30 days of Thankfulness this month.

Day 1

Today I am thankful for getting to have lunch with Cailyn and getting to see Jenna. God totally answered a prayer today with these girls. I've been feeling so lonely lately and was needing some good conversations with some great ladies. Thank you God for letting me feel like I'm a part of your kingdom today.

17 weeks

2010-10-29T13:38:00.001-06:00

We are almost half way there!

I feel like sometimes this is going by so slow and other times I can't believe how far along we are. I'm filled to the brim with thanks to God these days. The baby seems to be doing well. I can feel it sometimes but I'm still waiting for that big kick to the belly. All of our appointments are going well. I'm anticipating the next ultrasound. I know that it's not good to have an ultrasound done for no reason but I'm ready to see this baby again.

In 17 weeks I have gained 11 pounds. I always am so excited to step on the scale and see it go up. I think I'm one of few pregnant women who loves getting bigger.

I can't thank everyone enough for all the prayers and excitement that you have shared with me. We can't wait to meet this baby.

What's Next

2010-09-18T10:58:00.000-06:00

Dear Friends and Family:

We cannot thank God nor all of you enough for the many blessings in our lives. Obviously we are looking forward to the amazing gift of a child. Along with that life change, we are also discussing a major change of vocation. As many of you know, we have not exactly been happy in our current situation. We both have worked in jobs where we encounter children/young adults in horrible conditions and lacking in every kind of love. It is very difficult to work in this situation when we are not always able to share what would be most powerful for these children/young adults--food, a hug, prayer, spiritual love, and spiritual guidance. So last year, we started asking if God would open a way for us to find a new place in His mission. Almost a week later--no joke--our friends Josh and Jaime Fisher called to tell us about Mission Alive.

Mission Alive is a missional church planting organization in Dallas, TX. In late July, we attended Mission Alive’s Discovery Lab. The Lab is very intense; it is a three day spiritual assessment and discussion of faith. We learned a lot about ourselves and our marriage. At the end of the Lab, Mission Alive asked Lana and I to be Associate Church Planters. Preparing for church planting with Mission Alive is similar in many ways to preparing for foreign mission work. After a lot of prayer and discernment, Lana and I have decided to continue to pursue this opportunity. In mid-October, we will be attending the Theology Lab and hopefully in June the Strategy Lab. During the Strategy Lab, we will establish more of the concrete details which we naturally wonder--where, when, how, etc.

We ask now that you would keep us in your prayers. We also would appreciate a lot of questions so that you might be a part of our discernment process. We ask that you would specifically pray for Lana and her pregnancy. Please pray that we are patient--that we listen to God and sound counsel and not pursue our own selfish ideas. Please pray that even while making future plans we do not fail to use this time to serve others. And pray that we are open and listening to what God has to show us while at the Theology Lab--October 13-16.

Also, Lana says that asking for funds provides a wonderful way for people to feel apart of our lives and provides a reason to discuss God’s active presence in our lives. She is correct. It is also a testament to how God provides through His family. In July, we needed $950 to make the trip; we received $951. Through this June, we are asked to raise $1100. If any of you feel called to participate in our discernment financially, we would greatly appreciate it.

Up until now, we have been trying to discern if church planting is a vocation we should pursue. We believe it is. This will hopefully become a greater and greater part of our lives, and we hope that you will continue to be a part of our lives as well. Below we have listed contact information, information about Mission Alive, and some reading we have been doing about church planting.

Thank you. We love you,
Lana and Nathan Miller

Lana 660 233 2033 lanamcbanana@gmail.com
Nathan 660 909 8501 nfamiller@gmail.com

Lana and Nathan Miller
(Address not provided on public blog, please contact author for details)
Sedalia, MO 65301

Mission Alive missionalive.org

Readings:
The Tangible Kingdom
And: The Gathered and Scattered Church
Organic Church
Transforming Discipleship
Simply Christian
Reasons for God

The Green Light

2010-08-06T14:54:00.000-06:00

It has been a year and a half since our last miscarriage.

It has been 11 months since we first saw Dr. Cowen.

Finally, we got a green light to try and have a baby!

I've been hesitant to write this because I have no idea how much longer it will be until I get to write what will be one of my favorite post ever....the one were I tell you that we are expecting and every one is healthy. But I do know that it is closer that it was. At my last Dr. appointment I loved getting to answer all the questions that he asks every time. It was great this time because after a summer of traveling and not eating the way I had been I was ready for him to tell me I had to wait longer. Instead he let me know that I have done a great job at getting healthy and even with my routine all out of whack, I'm ready to have a baby and will have a very healthy home for it. I finally feel like all this hard work is paying off.

Thank you for your prayers and support. I am so thankful for God's hand in this. In fact I'm not even scared to get pregnant anymore. However, once I do it will be well into my second trimester before any of you know. But at least its getting closer!

The Discovery Lab

2010-06-13T18:48:00.003-06:00

June 12, 2010

Dear Family and Friends,

We hope this letter finds you well. We think of you and your families often. Nathan and I are writing this to share with you what God has been doing lately in our lives, and we would love to hear what He is doing in yours.

For the past few months, we have been spiritually lost and trying to figure out what direction God wants us to take. We finally came to the conclusion that we needed to stop whining about being lost and instead listen to God.

Soon after, the youth minister’s position became open in our church. This got us thinking, and we began to seriously discuss and pray about going into the ministry. We had a meeting with our pastor to discuss the youth position and the idea of going into the ministry. We all agreed that the position at our current church was not the right fit for us; really, we had no idea what the right fit might be. Our minister suggested we spend some time trying to discover what type of ministry we were passionate about. The next day our good friends, Josh and Jaime Fisher told us about the Discovery Lab, where young church leaders go to discover if they are interested in becoming church planters.

The Discovery Lab is part of a national ministry called Mission Alive. The purpose of Mission Alive is “to discover, equip, place, and nurture church planting leaders who will plant missional churches in suburbs, city centers, and poverty areas with unbelievers as the primary target.” Once we found out about this ministry, we both were very excited. Since then, we have had a phone conversation with the head of Mission Alive, Gailyn, and his wife Becky. They are amazing people, and we are really excited to get to know them.

The first step in joining this ministry is to attend the four-day “Discovery Lab” to discover if this ministry is right for us. Before we are able to attend however, we had to fill out a pretty intense application. We both finished the application about two weeks ago; it was very cleansing in a way. This whole process has happened so fast, and our lab is in Connecticut from July 15-18 of this year! We have about four weeks to raise money to go to the Discovery Lab. We need to raise $950 for the Lab, and this covers our costs while attending the Lab as well as helping to cover the costs of the Mission Alive team.

It is tempting to lean on our own abilities and resources to find a way to pay for the Lab. However, the Mission Alive team has encouraged us to raise the money. If we become church planting missionaries, we will have to learn how to raise money; and more importantly, we will have to be dependent upon God and His people for support. This also gives us an opportunity to share with our family and friends what God is doing in our lives. We are sorry this letter gives you short notice, and we are sorry that it comes in the form of an email rather than a more traditional letter. However, this happened quickly, and we are excited God has given us this opportunity. If you feel led to support us financially, we would obviously greatly appreciate it. There are many other ways we would appreciate your support as well. Please pray for us—pray for safe travel and that our hearts and minds are open to what God has to share with us. Please ask us about Mission Alive and the amazing things God is doing through this ministry. Even if we do not eventually become a part of this ministry, it is full of amazing, Godly people doing God’s work. And, please let us serve you. We have few talents, but we are willing.

If you have questions, please feel free to contact us. You can follow us on Lana’s blog at www.lanamcbanana.blogspot.com as we discover this ministry and learn what God has ready for us. We will send an update when we have finished the Discovery Lab and let you know what our next steps will be. You can also check out the Mission Alive website at www.missionalive.org.

Much Love,

Lana and Nathan

Lana: (660) 233-2033 and lanamcbanana@gmail.com

Nathan: (660) 909-8501 and nfamiller@gmail.com

Mowing Adventures

2010-06-04T07:43:00.001-06:00

Our yard hasn't been mowed in a while so I volunteered to do it. I have never done a zero turn mower so it took some getting used to. But after I knocked over the air conditioner and ran into the barn and almost got stuck in the ditch, I really enjoyed it. Here are some highlights.

I had an outfit picked out for the event. You can tell in the back ground that our grass was at least a foot tall.

The after shot. See the swirls? I learned how to do donuts.

I got much better and learned how to get around the tough spots.

This cat was very thankful for the short grass.

This orange lily(and spider) survived. Others like it may not have.

This was the only life lost in the making of this blog.

I miss Tif!

2010-05-26T19:43:00.000-06:00

I haven't taken many pictures this past year. But recently I got the "itch" to start taking more again. I wish more than ever Tiffany Williams was around to show me what to do. But these are some pretty good ones.

I heart Pepper

2010-04-06T16:44:00.000-06:00

When I was a little girl I would go visit my Grando and Papa. For some reason one thing about my Papa that I always remember is that he loved pepper. As a child I thought it was gross to see his eggs covered in pepper. As soon as we would sit down to eat he would reach for the pepper an soon everything on his plate would be covered in pepper.
Recently I discovered that when I look down at my plate it looks very familiar. I love pepper. I've never really liked salt, but it's sidekick I sure do love. I'm very proud of loving pepper. My Papa was an amazing man and I feel like I have a little of him in me when I sit down to eat and reach for the pepper.

Memory Monday

2010-03-29T18:01:00.000-06:00

This was the fire at Mount Sentinal. My friend Tiffany came over and we practiced our photography skills.

Prayers and Praises

2010-03-28T18:08:00.000-06:00

I keep meaning to write this and then find other things that I think need to be done. I can be really bad about not sharing good news and instead update you on the bad in my life. But this blog will have some of both, the good and the still sad.

I know so many people have been praying for me and the last couple of weeks I've been able to feel it. I still don't like this place at all. But it has been more bearable lately. I feel great. I'm not sure I've ever felt this healthy and it is amazing. At the beginning of this new health thing I wished more than ever that I still lived in Missoula. It would have been so much easier to eat and I would have had so much more support. I get a lot of things like...You make me sick(eating so healthy) and I could never take(fill in the blank)out of my diet and for some reason lots of people roll their eyes at you when you eat healthy. I was mad at God for making live here at try to do something that seemed impossible and lonely. But as always He knew what he was doing. Recently people have asked me for my Naturalpath's number. People have even showed interest in having a more healthy lifestyle. I've shared my story of this crazy journey more times in the last week and each time I do, it feels amazing.

Of course, Nathan has been very supportive and even feels better too. I have friends here who are interested and have even cooked some gluten free things for me. I am very grateful for this change.

I keep thinking of the song, Blessed be the Name of the Lord. I really like the verse that says....You GIVE and TAKE away. I feel like that has been my last year and a half. I have felt so far away from God and have even had feelings of giving up on Him. But I recently found out that I'm not in the black hole I thought I was. I'm just in the Wilderness trying hard to find my way out. Someone recently told me that even if you're complaining to God, it's a form of worship. It's not the form I want to do forever, but it made me feel like I'm not totally lost. I know God is here with me. I don't think I would know that if I didn't have so many of you praying for me. Thank you again.

I started my month long hormone test on Saturday. Please pray that everything goes the way it should. Each month I'm more ready than ever to be a mom. Also continue to pray for me to get out of this Wilderness. I'm still sad and struggling to live here. Some things are getting better and I'm thankful for that.

Thanks again for all your encouragement and prayers. Things are getting better.

A memorable Easter

2010-03-21T20:22:00.000-06:00

This is from one of my favorite Easters ever. We were at a sunrise service at Blue Mt. It was so amazing to see the sun come up over the mountains and worship God who created all.

Memory Monday

2010-03-15T19:42:00.000-06:00

I'm going to try to blog more so I'm starting a new thing called Memory Monday. This way I can have a smile or laugh about things that have happened in the past. I also try to always include a picture...Enjoy!

This is a Thank You picture to Angie and Jeremy...they made us the quilt for our wedding.

I'm glad I have a husband who is willing to do 'shenanigans' with me. And by the way this is the best nap quilt ever. I'm almost certain that it has magic nap powers.

My Valentine

2010-02-14T17:47:00.002-07:00

In the words of Sally Brown(Charlie Brown's sister)..."Isn't he the cutest thing you ever did see"

Guest Blogger

2010-02-08T17:02:00.002-07:00

Well Lana is again making a wonderful dinner, and on this snow-day, Lana asked me to write a blog post.

Let me first say I love my wife. She is beautiful, funny, and takes better care of me than I ever imagined possible. Just today she has made me breakfast, cookies, and is currently making a soup that boggles the mind and taste-buds. And those are just surface, silly things; she is emotionally the reason I am.

I have felt horrible recently because Lana has not been happy while here in Missouri. A lot of things have not gone the way we envisioned them, and though we know God is very near, we have not had the eternal eyes to acknowledge His work. And yet, Lana, though depressed, is still amazing and full of life when we are alone together (the rest of you are missing out and that is seriously your loss). Our relationship has grown greatly as we depend more on each other to survive a life we aren't always happy with. We have faith that God is waiting for us to get out of our funk and listen to Him. Lana questions her faith right now, but I assure her she is not lost. I know no one who mourns the hurt and loss of others more than she. "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and mourn with those who mourn." And though we may not be rejoicing much on our own currently, we have--we will--and Lana continues to love and care for me and show an empathy for the world I never imagine possible.

So please continue to pray for us, for Lana's health, for wisdom in what we should do. And if at all possible, laugh with us--we need to laugh... Also, try not to ask Lana too much about her job or her health (I mean show you care, but spend more time discussing other things). She is getting healthier though not where she wants to be yet; and her job stinks (don't talk about the job). Ask her about God and the future, and tell her everything about yourself. Thank you all, you have given us so much. And thank you to all who read this, because I know you all contributed in some way in making my wife who she is--and I like her quite a bit.

On a lighter and scarier note, we saw a bald eagle (no joke) carrying a dead cat down our road the other day. Our cats may not survive.

Guest Blogger,

The Husband

20 Reasons why we love Dad...Part 2

2010-01-11T19:24:00.003-07:00

Today is my dad's 60th Birthday. Since all his kids are spread out everywhere and couldn't be with him, we thought we'd send him good internet wishes. And since there are 3 of us we are doing 20 each because 20 times 3 equals 60(thanks dad for the math brains).

The following are 20 reasons why I love my dad.

21. the way he loves my mom

22. how hard he has worked to get to where he is today

23. how he strive to be healthy in what he eats

24. how adventurous he is

25. how fearless he is in all he does

26. his sincerity for everyone he meets

27. how he is very interested in other people's names(I often don't care and I think you should)

28. how he is still very active and its important to him

29. he never gives up

30. how much he loves his job

31. how he taught all of us that church is important even when we didn't want to go

32. he would do anything for us

33. he loves all his kids and is our biggest fan

34. how passionate he is about golf

35. he would do anything to help anyone out

36. he used to help me with math homework...trust me this had to make the list cause thats not an easy task, but he still did it.

37. he took us to see many things that most people didn't get the opportunity to see

38. he is passionate about mission trips

39. his love for me and my husband

40. his ability to always be calm

Happy Birthday Dad. I hope you have a great day. Thanks for all that you do for us. Love ya! Lana

www.myramoran.blogspot.com

www.alexlaird.blogspot.com

Christmas in Oklahoma

2010-01-03T15:45:00.002-07:00

Nathan and I went to see my family in Oklahoma after Christmas. We had a great time and as my sister put it, as always we felt right at home at my Aunt Kathy and Uncle Terry's house. It was a fun holiday with both families this year!

Mo and Aunt Kathy

funny faces with Mo

Sisters with hats

Grando had lots of presents

A letter to 2010

2009-12-31T11:14:00.003-07:00

Dear 2010,

Tomorrow we will meet and I am surprisingly excited. I know that we don't know each other yet but I'm convinced that we will be good to each other. Your old pal, 2009, and me didn't get along so well. Thankfully, we are leaving each other on a high note.

I'm afraid that I have big expectations for you. But I'm sure you will be able to live up to them. I think you and I should discuss having a baby this year. You'd be great as a Birthday. Also, I know its far away, but I'd like to remember you as the year we became happy again. I'm really wanting Nathan to be happy with his job. You haven't met him yet, but you will love him. He will be the one awake to welcome you tonight. Oh yeah, please don't hold that against me. I most likely won't be able to see your fresh new start, but you will be there for mine so hopefully that will be good enough.

Well, 2010, I am glad we had this talk. See you in the morning.

Your friend,

Lana

1 Christmas down, 2 to go...

2009-12-26T11:05:00.002-07:00

the new puppy, "Truman" for the Foster kids
Snow!

lots of sledding

Christmas Ornaments and trying to be artsy...

2009-12-17T13:37:00.002-07:00

Nathan and I went to see How the Symphony Saved Christmas. We had a great time together. The rest of these are me just trying to be artsy...

My Advent Calendar has been filled with great stuff!

B2 Bomber

2009-11-27T16:23:00.003-07:00

Wednesday before Thanksgiving we went to see the B2 Bombers. It was a great tour and we had an awesome time. Here are some highlights....

Mom and dad in the cockpit.

The Bus that took all 8 of us there.

Right in front of the B2

Taylor and I in the drivers seat!

It was too big to get a full picture of. It really was really cool to see it up close.

Thanksgiving

2009-11-22T06:40:00.003-07:00

This year Nathan and I have tried to talk more about what we are thankful for. This is good for you when you've become the most negative person ever. It helps you remember that when everything seems to be going wrong God is there, arms open, ready to show you that things aren't so bad. So here are a few things I'm thankful for this year.

I'm thankful that we get to have elk for thanksgiving this year. And my family will be here!

No, I'm not thankful for cats. I still think they are dumb. I am thankful that I can hold them with out dying now. I'm thankful for my health and how much better I feel.

I'm thankful that I got to go see my family this fall. And I'm thankful for my new nephew and this cute red head.

And I'm very thankful for this red head. I'm constantly falling more in love with him. I'm so thankful that he loves me and that God gave me him.

Kittens

2009-11-15T16:26:00.002-07:00

We just got some free kittens to hopefully scare the mice away. They are really cute even though I don't like cats. I'm allergic so they have to stay outside. I'll I ask is that they be cute and kill mice. Their names are Heidi Klum and Anne of Green Gables.

getting good back scratch

Heidi Klum posing for her fall shoot

She really wants in

Before and After...

2009-11-14T16:28:00.001-07:00

I've been doing some changing around here. Here are some before and after pictures of things I'm getting my hands on...

Ugly Pillow

Cute Pillow

Pumpkin

Pie!

God is good...

2009-11-04T19:36:00.002-07:00

We went to find out some results of a hormone test I took today. For some reason I had peace about finding out our results. I say "for some reason" because bad news seems to be very common in our life lately.

When I was at the Lighthouse in OKC, we often said, "God is good, all the time. And all the time, God is good." I think that I have recently forgotten this. No matter what God is there, even when everything feels like its falling apart.

Well today was a good day. After almost a year we now know what caused our miscarriages. My body doesn't make enough cortisol. This is a hormone that helps with energy throughout the day. I have lots of energy since I've been living a healthier lifestyle but still not what I should. Anyways, when your body doesn't make enough cortisol, it borrows from progesterone. So that is why when I was pregnant I wasn't making enough progesterone.

So the solution to this is for the most part easy. I need to watch my blood sugar and eat a good breakfast. Our doctor said that I need to be eating breakfast like I do dinner. I also need to eat more protein and fiber.

So I will once again have to work on my diet. But it will hopefully be worth it in the end. Thank you to all who prayed for us today! We will keep you updated!

Happy Birthday to my favorite Mo!

2009-10-24T09:21:00.002-06:00

My niece is turning 3 on Monday. Technically she is my first niece and although I never get to see her she really is the greatest little person I know. I'm excited for her 3rd year and I hope I get to see her more. Happy Birthday Morgandi!

Apple Picking

2009-10-13T18:12:00.003-06:00

We went apple picking this past weekend. It was a basket full of fun:)

A bump in the road

2009-09-25T09:54:00.002-06:00

Week two of my liver cleanse has been quite a challenge. This week I came down with pneumonia. I went to see my naturalpathic doctor so that I wouldn't be put on anitbiotics. I know some of you are thinking that this is a crazy idea. I should want antibiotics right? Well I don't right now. I have worked very hard to get all the yeast out of my body. I've eaten great and only have one week left to drink the nasty stuff. Anyways, my doctor gave me lots of stuff and so far I feel much better.

I discovered that eating healthy is really hard when you are sick. Nathan and I have enjoyed eating healthy these past weeks. I don't really even miss the other stuff cause I know how it will make me feel after I've eaten it. Man, that last sentence would have come in handy in many areas of my life in the past. Anyways, the only thing is that everything has to be prepared and when your both sick, that is a challenge. But we managed and found some half way easy recipes to get us through.

I've had a couple people ask me if I'm going to keep this up after 6 months. I'm not sure that I will stay as strict, but I will make better choices. Eat healthy for a week and you will see the difference. Not only does it taste good, but you won't feel as bad after you eat.

Prayers for this week: Please continue to pray for my job. And that I will allow God to have complete control over my life. I've been trying to hard to do things on my own and its wearing me out. Also, pray that I can make it to Orlando next weekend. I really want to see my family and Mo will be there. I've been wanting to play with her for a while now.

A new lifestyle...

2009-09-20T07:16:00.002-06:00

I started my liver cleanse last Monday. So far its been ok. We have decided that eating healthy tastes really good. When I think about what I was putting in my body before it makes me upset at myself. I realize most people eat unhealthy but I'm not sure why I choose to do that now.

In just a week I have been able to tell a difference. I've lost some weight and hope to loose a little bit more. I don't have much energy but that is to be expected while I do this cleanse. I'm not sure if the feeling better is more mental right now, but I guess that is a place to start.

Its been interesting to hear peoples reactions. Many seem to be worried about me right now.

Which I totally appreciate, however, it hit me last night that the worry should of come before I started making healthy choices. I'm sure people did then too, but now I'm on the way to a healthy life.

Thanks for your prayers and encouragement.

Please keep praying for my job. I really don't like it. It's really draining me. I realize that I may be making a difference in some of these kids lives but thats hard to see when they are cursing at you and biting and kicking and hitting and spitting on you. I know that we are here for a reason but I'm ready for God to show me why in a very clear way. I'm very lost and confused right now. Most things are better than last year, I just can't seem to get the feeling of dread to leave me. Pray that I don't dread everything I do here and that I can see more clearly why we are here.

World on Fire

2009-09-07T10:51:00.003-06:00

This is one of my favorite music videos ever. I know that its old but I think its a good reminder. Its funny how things like this make us feel great, yet most of us will go on about our day. Try not to forget this. Tell others. Do something for someone, near or far. Think about our healthcare crisis and remind yourself that some people don't even have the opportunities that we do. Pray for those who actually struggle with Healthcare and those who don't even have it. Thank God for the things you do have and ask Him to show you ways you can help others.

click here

World on Fire

Let's get personal...

2009-09-03T19:44:00.002-06:00

I've debated whether to write this or not and decided why not? 1. No one reads this blog anyways. 2. This way I won't have to talk about it 400 times. So lets get personal and talk about my health.

A little background first

Last year Nathan and I moved to Missouri. As a person who suffers from allergies, its not the best state to live in. Yes, its pretty but I can't say that I have been able to enjoy the beauty through watery eyes.

Also last year we had two miscarriages. Last year was not the best year of my life. It by far was a hard year for us both. Things are getting better.

The allergies are just part of living here and can be helped but will probably not completely go away while we still live here.

I've never been told any real reason why I've miscarried. I've heard a lot of Doctors and people say its just something that happens. And I was told that my progesterone was low but that was never clear. So this summer I was put on progesterone and the only thing that happened was I had a period about every 2 weeks. Not fun.

So I recently got advice from a friend to go see a Naturalpathic Doctor. That she had seen one and he helped her with so many issues that I also have. So I found one in Columbia and so far have been very pleased.

Last week Nathan and I met with him for 2 hours and he took notes and asked questions about what I have been going through. I told him everything from having mono to allergies/sinus infections to miscarriages. He was really good at asking the right questions and helping us fill in the blanks as far as how the body works. And he sent me to get some basic blood work.

The Results...

First of all he asked me what we want to get under control the most. My answer is first and foremost I want to have a baby one day. The allergies will be here as long as I'm living here so they came in second for me. But one reason why I like this doctor is because everything goes together.

I'm pretty healthy over all. However, I must have had the worse case of Mono ever cause I still have it two years later. Its not so bad that I need to stay home from work and sleep all day(darn.) But it is causing some issues with my liver, my immune system, and my digestive system.

The liver produces hormones that I lack. So this is the main thing we will focus on in the next couple of weeks. Also because I have had so many antibiotics this past year my body is not making "good" bacteria any more. You don't always need antibiotics for everything because it kills all your bacteria so the next time you get an infection your "good" bacteria is not there to fight it off. So I'm going to be taking probiotics for a while to get my good bacteria back. Also I'm not anemic but my iron level is a little low(probably from the mono). So I'll be taking iron for a few months too raise my energy level. Also I'll be taking a B complex to raise my energy. To start off with I have to do a liver cleanse. I'm looking forward to this so I can start feeling better. I'm also going to take seaweed and Omega 3 to reduce inflamation that the mono has also blessed me with. Also I have to have a better diet. Almost like a yeast free or Glueten free diet.

This is how it all goes together. Make my liver better=better immune system=better digestive system= less allergies/infections and BABY

I'm sure this is confusing so feel free to ask questions.

Here are some things you can pray for....

1. I'm sure I can have a better diet but I think that this will be hard with my lifestyle now.

2. That this next 6 months go quickly

3. That I can feel so much better and be on my way to a healthy pregnancy

4. this is just a bonus but for school. It starts next week and I'm getting depressed about it. But that's a whole other blog.

Try not to be too disappointed....

2009-08-21T09:41:00.003-06:00

I hate to burst bubbles, but there is something I must share with you milk lovers out there. I found out last night that they don't milk cows like they use to.

Last night, Nathan and I were walking around the fair when we saw a sign that said "cow milking" with an arrow pointing to the spot. I've always wanted to milk a cow. I got really excited and immediately followed the signs. What I found was not what I was looking for. I was looking for the farmer in his overalls on the stool milking the cow with his hands. Instead I found a building with one wall of windows and a machine milking poor Betsy. How can this be? Who invented such a dumb machine? So it is really fast but its not fun for me or the cow. What am I suppose to tell my children someday. I can't imagine them thinking that getting milk from a cow by way of machine is cool. I know everyone is spending a lot of time talking about health care now, but how could you when obviously there is more wrong in this world. Yes, it is faster to get the milk from the cow but it takes longer so set everything up. Frankly, I'm appalled at how lazy even farmers are now. And I decided that if I ever was a cow I'd be the beef kind now. That's right I'd rather be killed, sold, and eaten then be a machine milked cow. I'm sorry, cow its not your fault. I apologize for those of you who didn't realize this and are now not enjoying your glass of milk as much, but I felt it needed to be shared. I would never put anyone through my sour experience. In the end I did find a cow to milk. It wasn't the same but I guess it will have to do for now.

Missouri State Fair

2009-08-21T09:26:00.003-06:00

Last night was 2 dollar night at the fair. It has been really cool here so we thought it was a good time to go. I was trying to work on my photography skills. I decided there is no better place to practice then the state fair. Here are some of my favorites.

Winning Corn at the FFA Building
This sheep helped me out with its willingness to pose.
Even though these say no more trash...you can but trash in here. At least I did.
Who would want to finger feed this guy? Look at those teeth.
And what would a fair be with out the farris wheel.

Lots of Love

2009-08-10T19:26:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow is Nathan and my two year anniversary. I remember the days leading up to our wedding. So many people telling us how hard marriage is. Especially the first year. Our first year was great. I loved it more and more every day. Our second year came and we had some hard times. Not with each other but with our surroundings. Our lives weren't constantly happy anymore. It seemed like nothing was working out. However, in the midst of hard times, I was always thinking of how blessed I was to have Nathan. Thankfully, he is my best friend and I never get tired of him.

As I write this, Nathan is lounging on the couch with his newest Time Magazine and a baseball game in the background. And I am sitting here falling more and more in love with him. How is that possible? On the day we got married, I was sure that I loved him more than ever. But today, almost two years later, I love him so much more than that day.

Nathan is always there with encouraging words when I'm feeling down. And trust me that's a huge deal after this past year. He had to be very encouraging. He truly is my best friend. I can't wait for our next year together. I can't imagine that I will love him more than right now. I'm sure I will burst into a million pieces. That is lots of love.

Nathan I love you lots. Thank you for loving me and for being you.

Just some cute pictures to make you smile...

2009-08-08T10:39:00.002-06:00

Jen's Birthday party at the park. She is playing in the water here
right before we left Montana. The Partain boys.
Jes Marie, LC(Lana Carol as Jes calls me) and L Ray.
Sawyer blowing bubbles
Dodge.

Our quick trip to Glacier

2009-07-16T15:46:00.002-06:00

We made a quick trip up to Glacier before Jes had her baby. I have never seen so many Glacier animals before. We saw everything except a moose. As we were leaving we saw a mama bear and 2 babies, but I didn't get a picture in time. Glacier is always a great place to go, even if its for a short time.

Nathan was excited to get to wear his vest...in July.
This is at the top of the pass. There was tons of snow at the top.
Baby goats about to jump off a boulder. They got really close to us.
The last bit of sunshine of the day.
The Goats were starting to rub off their coats for the summer time. I don't think I even used my zoom on this one. He's kinda cute.

Baby Landon Ray Partain

2009-07-12T22:25:00.002-06:00

On friday, my friend Jes had baby Landon. He is so sweet and they are both doing great

Jen and Jes after a not very long labor. Way to go Jes!
Landon with his eyes open. I love his chin.
Jes is holding him now. This is what happens when she holds her son...he sleeps.
Me and Landon. The nurse had just come in and mistaken me for his mom. I must say I look really good for just having a baby.
Thinking about maybe waking up.

There's no God like Jehovah...15 times and JOY

2009-07-12T22:03:00.004-06:00

We had church in the park today at Missoula Valley. We sang "These are the days of Elijah," and on the last part of the song it said to sing the part, There's no God like Jehovah, 15 times. My friend Jen and I counted and it was right on. Nathan tried to hide it but I reminded him that at least I'm laughing and not crying. I've decided that church is great just like that. If you're full of joy than its been a good day. Since we've been here I have been reminded of that joy that has been hiding for a while. So I hope this post brings you Joy.

Katie bug sharing some Joy.
Sawyer with his flipflops on his ears. I love how he's trying to look at them. Joy.
Nathan and Sawyer's funny faces. Although to find Joy look at Sawyer. Nathan looks hungry.
Sawyer is ready to go over to the park in the background. Joy.
McKenna, sang Twinkle, Twinkle and ABC's together to baby Landon. Joy

4th of July Celebrations

2009-07-07T10:49:00.002-06:00

We had a busy day on the 4th of July. Nathan spent most of the day at the baseball park. Then we went to the Canhams party. Its always a great time. We finished off the day at the mall watching fireworks. I posted some pics of my favorite parts of the day....

Nathan and I at the Canham party.

It looks like Sawyer is not liking the loud noise, but after about 1o minutes he actually feel asleep!

Our friend Justin lighting his fireworks...love the pants!
Our friend Noah at the Canhams. He needed an extra hand to cover his ears. But his way worked so he could still light fireworks and never hear them. This cracked me up!

Totally Worth It Lake

2009-07-05T14:58:00.003-06:00

We went on a day hike up to Glen Lake in the Bitterroot last Friday with some friends. I had done this hike two years ago and since then there has been a fire. So it was a different kind of beautiful. Here are some highlights...

You could see for miles with out any leaves on the trees.
Glen Lake. Last time we were here we couldn't find it easily so once we did we dubbed it TWI or totally worth it. It's still so breath taking.
Nathan on a rock just before a short storm passed through.
Cooper kept Jen company most of the hike.
A walking stick for Ben...just his size. The tree to the right will someday be my wood floors.

Beautiful Flowers

2009-07-02T10:05:00.002-06:00

We have seen so really pretty flowers while we've been here. Here are a few from the Satterlees garden. The Fushia is one we bought for Angie and Jeremy for letting us stay with them. Just another reason why Montana is one of the most beautiful places ever.

Staying with the Partains

2009-06-29T22:58:00.002-06:00

Our first week in Montana, we stayed with Angie and Jeremy Partain and their three boys. We had so much fun with all of them that we decided to go back and visit them again today. Here are some highlights from our week...

the newest Partain, Dodge. He is such a sweet baby and I loved getting to hold him lots.
Nathan tried to do nap time with the Cooper and Sawyer. Eventually they had to go to their room.
Sawyer and me at Out to Lunch in Cara's Park
"Nafin" and the boys at our cookout.

Funny Faces

2009-06-26T17:30:00.002-06:00

We took Cooper and Sawyer out the other day. They made lots of funny faces while Nathan was in the bank. Both were really funny and very proud of their faces.

a very cute picture

2009-06-25T17:21:00.000-06:00

Even More Pictures!

2009-06-24T14:44:00.002-06:00

Our second day in Montana we came to the hot springs. Its about a mile hike in the most beautiful place in Idaho. I have forgotten just how pretty this place truly is. As you can tell it was kinda chilly starting out but it warmed up pretty fast. We also did see some naked people, as this is a clothing optional hot springs. But I didn't take any pictures of them...don't worry.

Belgrade MT...Part 2...the Olivers

2009-06-23T16:23:00.002-06:00

The girls...Me, Katie, Vanessa, and Alyssa
Vanessa is proud of her things at her house. We loved them.

First stop...Worland, WY

2009-06-22T22:52:00.003-06:00

Our first stop on our trip was in WY visiting our new and old friends. Kade and Ella were really cute. We had a great time with everyone.
Guy time
Kade is ready to take off...always.

Playing with each other
Ella aways has a question...Hopefully one day she can ask it.

Fun with Morgandy

2009-06-17T23:14:00.003-06:00

Just some pics of Morgandy. We had so much

fun with her. She's a great kid.

Back to MO I go...

2009-06-11T18:12:00.003-06:00

I have loved being with my family here in FL.
But I'm not too sad to leave this time because of
this guy...isn't he cute!

I think I found me again...

2009-06-10T08:17:00.002-06:00

I'm starting to feel more like me again lately and it feels great. I know that in life you change all the time, but I had changed into someone I don't like. Its like being home has helped a ton. I'm talking more, smiling more, and starting to like myself more. And I'm almost certain that I heard myself laugh the other day. I'm hoping this keeps up so that when we have to come back to Sedalia I'll be ready to deal with that person I don't much care for.

Nathan and I are hoping this next year will be better than the past year. I think we had too many expectations last time only to have them crushed. This time I'm not going to expect anything and just hope to have some good times before we move. I am so thankful for a lot of things this past year but still not sure of God's reason for us being there yet. Maybe He's told me but I just haven't listened hard enough. But this summer I'm going to ask a lot and listen even more. Things will be better.

Me and Mo

2009-06-08T18:56:00.003-06:00

My favorite part of summer so far.

The Beach

2009-06-08T05:58:00.002-06:00

The beach was lots of fun. Morgandy really loved
it and could have stayed in the water all day.

Kennedy Space Center

2009-06-08T05:49:00.002-06:00

Nathan prepare to lift off in 10, 9, 8, 7....
Space shuttle in the back ground
The Crawler...coming back from getting the
space shuttle
on the moon
Nathan as on of the first astronauts...the best
looking one for sure.

Anni, the best dog ever

2009-06-05T18:54:00.004-06:00

This was our dog, Anni. She is going to a better home. But she was the best do ever!